I was running through the maze , scared shit-less for my life.
It wasn't that I was being chased, but I just knew that death was closing in on me.
I was completely out of options, but I just knew,instinctively, that there was a loophole somewhere.However I also knew that this 'loophole' was almost as scary as death itself. Still, out of options, I decided to take that chance.
Death reached out to me, but I was suddenly out of its grasp, I had just gone insane.Not your usual completely loony kind of insane, but just a bit. Just enough to be out of the grasp of death, away from the invader of all realms, from that stealer of princes and peasants.
.Free.
And free I was , completely. But the cost was unbelievable, to trade in your sanity for life. It is a hard bargain and a small part of me knew that something really really wrong had just happened.
It was somewhere at this juncture that I awoke from a really weird dream , completely drenched in sweat and freezing at the same time. I was immobile , my limbs were completely stuck and I realized that I had never been this scared in my life.
Now I don't live a very normal life, I climb mountains and cliffs and bridges, I drive boats at high speed while being chased by unhappy fishermen or cops (or both) in rough seas and I do a fair amount of adrenaline pumping activities on most days . So when I say scared , I use that word in every possible extreme that you can imagine.
And then as I lay in my bed trying to make sense of what the hell was going on, I heard footsteps outside my room. Now I live on the roof of a 3 storey building, the only access to the roof is a small door which I lock every night before I go to sleep. So how who in the hell is walking outside my door at 2 in the morning?
I think about looking outside my window, but suddenly , out of the blue I remember Gabriel's story ( I sailed with Gabriel for a while on the Arctic Sunrise) about how he heard an unearthly cry outside his house in San Fransisco and how he instinctively felt that whatever it was , He did not want to attract 'its' attention, and so he lay in bed for the next few minutes freezing and sweating at the same time , till sleep overtook him.
Now, I had heard this story from Gabe at least 3 months ago , and I have not once thought about it.Not once that I can remember. Now at 2 o' clock in the night, 3 months later, It came back to me out of nowhere , at least 6 times zones away from where the story was told ( in Dakar,Senegal).
So I kept my head down , didn't make a sound, and waited for this strange encounter to pass. But it didn't.
Whatever 'it' was , was already in the room and I was too fucking scared to move a muscle. So I closed my eyes and thought of every single spiritual experience I had ever had. Using my thought as a shield between me and this ' presence'.
I guess I must have drifted away to sleep because I remember waking up in the morning, extremely tired and jittery. But still very much alive. And somehow stronger.
Amrit
13th July, 2010 Bangalore
It wasn't that I was being chased, but I just knew that death was closing in on me.
I was completely out of options, but I just knew,instinctively, that there was a loophole somewhere.However I also knew that this 'loophole' was almost as scary as death itself. Still, out of options, I decided to take that chance.
Death reached out to me, but I was suddenly out of its grasp, I had just gone insane.Not your usual completely loony kind of insane, but just a bit. Just enough to be out of the grasp of death, away from the invader of all realms, from that stealer of princes and peasants.
.Free.
And free I was , completely. But the cost was unbelievable, to trade in your sanity for life. It is a hard bargain and a small part of me knew that something really really wrong had just happened.
It was somewhere at this juncture that I awoke from a really weird dream , completely drenched in sweat and freezing at the same time. I was immobile , my limbs were completely stuck and I realized that I had never been this scared in my life.
Now I don't live a very normal life, I climb mountains and cliffs and bridges, I drive boats at high speed while being chased by unhappy fishermen or cops (or both) in rough seas and I do a fair amount of adrenaline pumping activities on most days . So when I say scared , I use that word in every possible extreme that you can imagine.
And then as I lay in my bed trying to make sense of what the hell was going on, I heard footsteps outside my room. Now I live on the roof of a 3 storey building, the only access to the roof is a small door which I lock every night before I go to sleep. So how who in the hell is walking outside my door at 2 in the morning?
I think about looking outside my window, but suddenly , out of the blue I remember Gabriel's story ( I sailed with Gabriel for a while on the Arctic Sunrise) about how he heard an unearthly cry outside his house in San Fransisco and how he instinctively felt that whatever it was , He did not want to attract 'its' attention, and so he lay in bed for the next few minutes freezing and sweating at the same time , till sleep overtook him.
Now, I had heard this story from Gabe at least 3 months ago , and I have not once thought about it.Not once that I can remember. Now at 2 o' clock in the night, 3 months later, It came back to me out of nowhere , at least 6 times zones away from where the story was told ( in Dakar,Senegal).
So I kept my head down , didn't make a sound, and waited for this strange encounter to pass. But it didn't.
Whatever 'it' was , was already in the room and I was too fucking scared to move a muscle. So I closed my eyes and thought of every single spiritual experience I had ever had. Using my thought as a shield between me and this ' presence'.
I guess I must have drifted away to sleep because I remember waking up in the morning, extremely tired and jittery. But still very much alive. And somehow stronger.
Amrit
13th July, 2010 Bangalore
